Okay, that tears it. I can't refrain from speaking some thoughts in my head, though of little value they may be. And since I don't want to write a four-page essay on why the 2016 United States presidential election has been finding new ways to tick me off nearly every day, I will let out thoughts on a few recent movie watches I have had instead.
* Gremlins - Once you get to know my film attitudes a little bit more, you find out I have trouble connecting with comedies. Especially horror movies that are supposed to be comedies. M. Night Shyamalan's The Visit has been about the best exception that has come along for me, and thinking about how I actually found a horror comedy I enjoy makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. As for Gremlins, it is another case where I have trouble seeing the comedy. I get near the verge of laughing perhaps twice near the end, but otherwise it feels like the movie is playing it straight or the pace and the monsters on the screen become frenetic and unsupported. I just do not feel safe while watching the movie. There is no comedy that gives me comfort in it. Though Gizmo doesn't appear real, instead an animatronic, that doesn't bother me so much. I notice three problems: The first is the elements that I don't have trouble believing don't feel fleshed out enough for me, and there are too many times where I wonder whether I should be unhooking my jaw so it may drop. The next is the monsters, the gremlins; I find them disgusting and obnoxious, not at all funny, unpredictable and with their brutality, well, bordering on frightening. The third is something I started picking up on when the film's action was near the middle. It is that the music is relentless. Even during the quieter scenes, like where Kate explains why she no longer celebrates Christmas, the music is still going at it, though at a lower volume, still putting me on the edge of my seat. The music is not melodious or reflecting the reality of her story, but jabbing at us. To me, Gremlins is not humorous, but jarring. Rating: 2/5
* (Scott Derrickson's) Doctor Strange - I wrote too much for Gremlins, so I'll make these next two shorter. The 14th film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe is by far the best-looking of all of them. There are many minor improvements over past installments. What often happens with me is that I start noticing the defects of the movie as a whole and for its individual parts when it approaches the end; that is when my critical mind starts kicking in. In general, the MCU movies are well-made and have great talents putting them together. None have failed on my scale so far, but they really haven't taken off either. I was hoping this one would be the game-changer, but it sadly is not. These films give backstories, but they speed through the process of how the heroes become heroes or plow through how the central problems for the heroes that require the use of fight scenes develop. Doctor Strange is no exception, and as for the central problems in this film, they are led into through coincidences. I absolutely loathe coincidences, as it shows a lack of imagination. The point that the coincidences in this movie happen without real felt buildup to the first fight creates static in my mind. It just doesn't feel right. Benedict Cumberbatch is very likeable, though we may not always be able to say the same about the title character he plays. There is another cop-out ending, but at least part of it is actually meant to be humorous, so I'll partially excuse it. Don't even get me started on how the midcredits or postcredits sequences feel rushed into to advance the scope of the MCU world. The midcredits one is strange, of course it is, and makes me notice the plot gaps in the Thor canon more, but it least got me even more excited for Thor: Ragnarok next fall. The postcredits scene is inexcusable and just doesn't feel right. I am frightened that the world of Doctor Strange might go the route of Thor. Oh dear God, why did I have to put that thought into my head now?! Okay, okay, moving on. Doctor Strange should be able to please just about everyone. It showcases the Marvel Cinematic Universe at its best, which, at least to me, still reminds me that there is still room for improvement. Rating: 3 1/2 /5
* Gremlins - Once you get to know my film attitudes a little bit more, you find out I have trouble connecting with comedies. Especially horror movies that are supposed to be comedies. M. Night Shyamalan's The Visit has been about the best exception that has come along for me, and thinking about how I actually found a horror comedy I enjoy makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. As for Gremlins, it is another case where I have trouble seeing the comedy. I get near the verge of laughing perhaps twice near the end, but otherwise it feels like the movie is playing it straight or the pace and the monsters on the screen become frenetic and unsupported. I just do not feel safe while watching the movie. There is no comedy that gives me comfort in it. Though Gizmo doesn't appear real, instead an animatronic, that doesn't bother me so much. I notice three problems: The first is the elements that I don't have trouble believing don't feel fleshed out enough for me, and there are too many times where I wonder whether I should be unhooking my jaw so it may drop. The next is the monsters, the gremlins; I find them disgusting and obnoxious, not at all funny, unpredictable and with their brutality, well, bordering on frightening. The third is something I started picking up on when the film's action was near the middle. It is that the music is relentless. Even during the quieter scenes, like where Kate explains why she no longer celebrates Christmas, the music is still going at it, though at a lower volume, still putting me on the edge of my seat. The music is not melodious or reflecting the reality of her story, but jabbing at us. To me, Gremlins is not humorous, but jarring. Rating: 2/5
* (Scott Derrickson's) Doctor Strange - I wrote too much for Gremlins, so I'll make these next two shorter. The 14th film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe is by far the best-looking of all of them. There are many minor improvements over past installments. What often happens with me is that I start noticing the defects of the movie as a whole and for its individual parts when it approaches the end; that is when my critical mind starts kicking in. In general, the MCU movies are well-made and have great talents putting them together. None have failed on my scale so far, but they really haven't taken off either. I was hoping this one would be the game-changer, but it sadly is not. These films give backstories, but they speed through the process of how the heroes become heroes or plow through how the central problems for the heroes that require the use of fight scenes develop. Doctor Strange is no exception, and as for the central problems in this film, they are led into through coincidences. I absolutely loathe coincidences, as it shows a lack of imagination. The point that the coincidences in this movie happen without real felt buildup to the first fight creates static in my mind. It just doesn't feel right. Benedict Cumberbatch is very likeable, though we may not always be able to say the same about the title character he plays. There is another cop-out ending, but at least part of it is actually meant to be humorous, so I'll partially excuse it. Don't even get me started on how the midcredits or postcredits sequences feel rushed into to advance the scope of the MCU world. The midcredits one is strange, of course it is, and makes me notice the plot gaps in the Thor canon more, but it least got me even more excited for Thor: Ragnarok next fall. The postcredits scene is inexcusable and just doesn't feel right. I am frightened that the world of Doctor Strange might go the route of Thor. Oh dear God, why did I have to put that thought into my head now?! Okay, okay, moving on. Doctor Strange should be able to please just about everyone. It showcases the Marvel Cinematic Universe at its best, which, at least to me, still reminds me that there is still room for improvement. Rating: 3 1/2 /5
* Constantine - I said I was going to make these shorter, but I didn't. Dang it. Oh well. Constantine is the one of these three that I have the least to say about anyway. The movie is uneven, nauseatingly uneven. If you're not following along with the plot you can quickly become lost. But I still liked it. Why? The plot, the visuals, the actors. Some may accuse me of being more biased toward DC than Marvel. DC films are always experimenting. Some of the finished results are miserable failures, but the risk-taking in both structure, visuals, tone, and world-building ends up creating far more true gems than Marvel does. Marvel movies for the most part are rigid and try to perfect what they already have. DC movies toss paint at a canvas and see if the dots draw out inspiration. For all Constantine's faults, it sure as heck is fun, every second of it. Not all of it believable, or maybe strikes a person as too weird or amusing, but it balances itself out by digging back into the intricacies of the plot. As the movie went along I found myself comparing and contrasting it to Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance. This is the movie that Marvel film could have been like if it had actually focused more on quality. The Hell in Constantine is different, and I kind of like it. Last thing to note: Both comic book movies in this post star Tilda Swinton. She stands out in both, but in a very, very good way. (...Though not everyone may agree with me about her in regards to the Marvel production.) Rating: 3 5/8 /5
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